As the dust settles on another heinous performance, It’s time to turn the page and make some high-quality NFL Week 6 selections.  Either that, or find a sports almanac in the year 2015.

Yeah, that reference doesn’t work so well anymore.

Hindsight is 20/20.  With that being said, looking back on last week, it was silly to pick the Redskins with the Saints motivated and itching to celebrate Drew Brees and the NFL passing record.  The Packers were also way too risky on the road, considering the plethora of injuries to the Green Bay offense. 

But I digress.

Now that I’ve looked BACK, it’s time to look TO THE FUTURE. 

See what I did there, McFly?

That’s right, this week’s theme is the Back to the Future trilogy. 

Wait, wait… hang on a minute…

“The time-traveling is just too dangerous. Better that I devote myself to study the other great mystery of the universe: women!”

But, but… THE WIFE HATES SPORTS?

Right, right.  Let’s get back on track – and here are MY FIVE LOCKS for the week, with my NFL Week 6 WINNERS against the spread highlighted in RED.

I promise these picks won’t make you feel like you’re backing into a manure truck.

KP’s 1.21 Gigawatt Picks for NFL Week 6

FIVE – Pittsburgh Steelers at Cincinnati Bengals (-2.5)

It’s a rivalry with the Steelers traveling to Cincinnati to take on the division-leading Bengals.  Yes, Cincy is in first, but they have been winning ugly.  Meanwhile, Big Ben and the Steelers may be turning the corner after posting 41 points against the Falcons last week.  Most importantly, the Bengals haven’t defeated the Steelers since 2015, a game where Le’Veon Bell tore his ACL.  But getting back to Pittsburgh’s recent dominance over Cincinnati, it just further proves that when the big stage comes around, the Bengals, well… “you guys aren’t ready for that yet”.

But your kids are gonna love it.  Either way, Steelers win.

FOUR – San Francisco 49ers at Green Bay Packers (-9.5)

Matt Breida is doubtful, joining the growing list of injured 49ers this season.  That leaves CJ Beathard and Alfred Morris to battle Aaron Rodgers and the Packers at Lambeau Field on Monday night?  But KP, Aaron Rodgers may have had a setback and could need a larger brace.  Also, Randall Cobb and Geronimo Allison are still banged up.  Guys, it’s Aaron Rodgers at Lambeau on Monday Night Football.  You think that San Francisco can hang?  “That’s about as funny as a screen door on a battleship.”

Packers cover at home.

THREE – Buffalo Bills at Houston Texans (-9.5)

Every one of Houston’s games have been decided by a touchdown or less, including the last two in overtime.  The Bills have been a bit of a Jekyll and Hyde squad, with both shocking wins and blowout losses.  The key will be protecting Josh Allen against a ferocious Houston D-line.  But in the end, let’s just look at the numbers, where the Texans are 1-9 in their last ten games against the spread.

If I’m wrong, I’ll just “make like a tree and get outta here”.  Give me Buffalo and the points.

TWO – Jacksonville Jaguars at Dallas Cowboys (+3)

The Dallas pass game has been borderline non-existent, leaving Ezekiel Elliott to carry the load.  Plug in the relentless Jacksonville defense, which is number one against the pass and Dallas will likely be one-dimensional again.  Expect the Jags to stack the box against Elliott, forcing the Cowboys to get their pass game moving in the right direction.  Jalen Ramsey is questionable, so if for some reason he misses, it could open a door for Dallas.  Otherwise, the Cowboys could be drowning in mediocrity yet again.  Quick, somebody grab a life preserver.

Give me – the dork with the life preserver – the Jags to cover on the road.

ONE – Chicago Bears at Miami Dolphins (+3)

The “shark still looks fake”… and so do the Dolphins.  Miami followed a blowout loss to the Pats by squandering a 17-0 lead to the Bengals last week.  Enter the Bears, coming off a bye and led by superstar Khalil Mack.  Chicago’s top-rated run defense and top ten pass defense will give Miami fits.  Meanwhile, the Dolphins, with a defense that has an NFL-high ten picks, will hope to force numerous Mitch Trubisky mistakes.  But in the end, the week of prep and solid D will leave Miami’s fans feeling like they’re instead watching a really bad Jaws sequel.

Bears cover on the road.

 

2018 NFL Season to Date (ATS)

Week 1 | Week 2 | Week 3 | Week 4 | Week 5

Don’t forget the SportsChump/KP/J-Dubs Pick ’em Contest!

 

Happy football – and as always, thanks for visiting The Wife Hates Sports!

Movie Credits: Back to the Future | Back to the Future II