The first week of a new NFL season is always unique, because there are so many open-ended questions that it’s like you and the WIFE (that HATES sports) are almost on the same playing field.

OK, so that may be an exaggeration, because we do have an idea of just how good teams are, plus we are familiar with the offseason moves that each franchise made.

She’s lucky to even know each team’s mascot.

But there are the things that we don’t know.

For example, we didn’t realize that the official beverage of the NFL was going to be Peyton Manning Haterade, now did we?  Despite the sluggish first week, Manning and the Broncos still found a way hateradeto beat the Ravens.

We didn’t know that Rex Ryan and the Bills would feast on Andrew Luck and the Colts.

We also didn’t realize that Marcus Mariota would eat the Tampa Bay defense for breakfast.

Is this making anyone else hungry?

No one knew that this NFL Week 2 Picks intro would be so food-centric.

One thing’s for sure, my opening week record of 7-9 is making me lose my appetite, especially when it’s paired with THE WIFE’s 8-8 mark.

Oh and the coin toss landed a 14-2 record in Week 1!  It only misfired on the Bears and Redskins.

Better move on to the Week 2 games, so that I can go grab a snack.

But first, a quick recap from Week 1:

KP (7-9), The WIFE (8-8), Coin Toss (14-2), SportsChump (7-8-1) and Special Guest Hanahan (9-7)

drew-brees-new-orleans-saints-qb

Drew Brees and the Saints take on the Bucs in Week 2

It’s once again time to “Pick Your Knows” – the only time it’s not a disgusting habit – and here are Week 2’s games (with spreads as they appeared through CBS Sports on 9/15/15).

KP’s “Pick Your Knows”: 2015 NFL Week 2 Picks

Denver Broncos at Kansas City Chiefs (-3.5)

The chatter on Peyton Manning is getting louder: he’s lost it, he’s done, he’s toast.  I just don’t buy it.  Sure, Manning may have lost a little arm strength, but the biggest problems are on Denver’s offensive line, as well as adjusting to a new offensive scheme with Gary Kubiak.  Eli had similar challenges in New York.  The Chiefs have plenty of talent and is difficult to beat at Arrowhead, but with the line at 3 1/2 points, I like Manning and the Broncos.

KP’s Pick: Denver Broncos

Update: Broncos 31, Chiefs 24 – For the record, this pick was posted at SportsChump on Thursday and WOW – what a finish!

Tennessee Titans at Cleveland Browns (-1.5)

Marcus Mariota looked like the league’s MVP against the bumbling Bucs, but he’s still a rookie and will be facing one of the best corners in the game in Joe Haden.  Cleveland’s starting QB is up in the air, and it all depends on whether Josh McCown is able to practice without any setbacks.  If not, it’s Johnny Manziel – and that’s enough for me to take the Titans.

KP’s Pick: Tennessee Titans

Tampa Bay Buccaneers at New Orleans Saints (-10.5)

The Bucs were absolutely torched by Marcus Mariota and the Titans at home last week.  Now, Tampa Bay travels to New Orleans to take on Drew Brees and the Saints.  Is there really any analysis needed here?  The answer to that question is NO.  Saints cover.

KP’s Pick: New Orleans Saints

New England Patriots at Buffalo Bills (+0.5)

The Bills surprised many by shutting down Andrew Luck and knocking off the Colts in Week 1.  This week, Rex Ryan is foaming at the mouth, spewing out Patriots hate, his favorite pastime.  One of his quotes complimented Rob Gronkowski, stating that in order to cover him, a player “would have to look like King Kong”.  In practice this week, LeSean McCoy is dealing with a hamstring issue, which would hamper Buffalo’s offense.  To put it simply, it’s hard to pick against Tom Brady, especially with a tossup line.  Patriots win on the road.

KP’s Pick: New England Patriots

Arizona Cardinals at Chicago Bears (+2.5)

Andre Ellington is out with an injury, leaving veteran RB Chris Johnson to anchor the running game.  Carson Palmer was strong in his return and should have a big day against Chicago’s pass defense.  John Fox will likely focus on running the ball with Matt Forte, taking on an Arizona defense that allowed just 54 yards on the ground in Week 1.  Give me the Cards and we can all witness Jay Cutler playing 52 pickup.

KP’s Pick: Arizona Cardinals

San Francisco 49ers at Pittsburgh Steelers (-6.5)

The first half of San Francisco’s Monday night game against the Vikings was ugly, but it eventually led to Carlos Hyde’s coming out party.  The Vikings never got in sync offensively and some of the credit can go to the Niners’ defense.  Just not all of it.  The Steelers still won’t have Le’Veon Bell, but that didn’t slow down Pittsburgh’s offense in Week 1 against New England.  With the home crowd backing them, I’ll take the over on Terrible Towels (in attendance) and I’ll also take the Steelers to cover at home.

KP’s Pick: Pittsburgh Steelers

St. Louis Rams at Washington Redskins (+3.5)

The Rams managed six sacks in Week 1 against the Seahawks and now face a more inexperienced Washington O-line and QB Kirk Cousins.  DeSean Jackson is out with a partially torn hamstring, while TE Jordan Reed was also hampered during practice with a hamstring issue, too.  That’s two key weapons on offense and with the Rams’ aggressive defense on the other side, I like St. Louis to cover on the road.

KP’s Pick: St. Louis Rams

San Diego Chargers at Cincinnati Bengals (-3.5)

San Diego has struggled in the past when traveling east, but I don’t put too much stock into that.  Instead, it’s more Cincinnati’s home crowd, as well as the Bengals’ overall balance, with Jeremy Hill leading the run game and A.J. Green catching key passes from Andy Dalton.  The Bengals are also solid defensively.  Give me the Bengals to cover at home, but barely.

KP’s Pick: Cincinnati Bengals

Houston Texans at Carolina Panthers (-3.5)

Ryan Mallett gets the start for the Texans and typically, I would shy away from new starters.  However, Carolina may be without Luke Kuechly – its defensive leader – due to a concussion.  That adds pressure on Carolina’s offense, which is short on weapons and will have to face the monstrous J.J. Watt in the trenches.  For these reasons, give me the Texans on the road.

KP’s Pick:  Houston Texans

Atlanta Falcons at New York Giants (-2.5)

Dan Quinn won his coaching debut in Atlanta, but needed a little help from a missed Cody Parkey field goal late in the fourth.  The Falcons blew a large lead in the second half and the team’s defense still has its holes, which could struggle against the likes of Eli Manning and Odell Beckham Jr.  The Giants lost a heartbreaker to the Cowboys on Sunday night and will be looking to bounce back.  Rashad Jennings was told not to score and he let that get out into the media, but it doesn’t seem to be causing unrest in the locker room.  That aside, this game smells like a shootout, but I’ll lean on Quinn’s defensive mind and the fact that the Falcons were likely worn down by Philly’s high-octane offense.  The Giants are talented, but don’t move at that pace.  Give me Atlanta by a late Matt Bryant field goal.

KP’s Pick: Atlanta Falcons

Detroit Lions at Minnesota Vikings (-3.5)

The Vikings were horrible in Week 1 and will be playing on short rest, after a late Monday night game on the west coast.  Adrian Peterson wasn’t used enough in Week 1 and Teddy Bridgewater – who is typically very accurate – wasn’t.  As much as I’d like to pick the Vikes at home, I’d feel more comfortable betting on a toddler to scarf down a bowl of lima beans in one sitting.  Detroit tops a Minnesota team that is still searching for answers offensively.

KP’s Pick: Detroit Lions

Baltimore Ravens at Oakland Raiders (+7.5)

The Ravens did a great job shutting down Peyton Manning in Week 1, and now will face a weaker offense in Oakland.  Terrell Suggs is out for the year, which will be a hit on Baltimore’s defense.   For Oakland, QB Derek Carr has ability and he has rookie WR Amari Cooper, but it’s just too much to pick against the Ravens (Suggs or not), even on the road.

KP’s Pick: Baltimore Ravens

Miami Dolphins at Jacksonville Jaguars (+6.5)

Blake Bortles is lashing out at fans for criticizing the team’s play calling.  What about the play call execution?  Miami is just too balanced and too talented to go betting against them, especially when facing a youthful Jacksonville team that has a lot to learn.  Dolphins cover.

KP’s Pick: Miami Dolphins

Dallas Cowboys at Philadelphia Eagles (-5.5)

The Eagles shook the cobwebs off and played very well in the second half of Week 1, only to lose to Atlanta after a Cody Parkey missed field goal in the fourth.  This week, Philly gets a home game against rival Dallas, who will be without Dez Bryant.  The Cowboys’ run game isn’t the same without DeMarco Murray and when you toss in the absence of Bryant, I like Philly’s high-octane offense to win its home opener by a touchdown.

KP’s Pick: Philadelphia Eagles

Seattle Seahawks at Green Bay Packers (-3.5)

Don’t call it a revenge game, that’s what the Packers say.  What should be said is instead how the Seahawks allowed six sacks to the Rams last week.  Aaron Rodgers and the passing game didn’t skip a beat without Jordy Nelson, while getting a boost from old friend James Jones.  Revenge game?  Yes, no matter what they say.  Raucous Lambeau crowd?  Double yes.  Packers cover at home.

KP’s Pick: Green Bay Packers

New York Jets at Indianapolis Colts (-7.5)

People are frantically jumping off the Colts’ bandwagon after Andrew Luck was shut down in Buffalo last week.  Shock and awe is rising with the Jets, too.  But it’s one week… and while T.Y. Hilton is a question mark, the Colts still have plenty of other weapons if T.Y. can’t suit up.  The Jets also were facing the Browns and Johnny Manziel last week.  Yeah, give me the Colts to cruise at home on Monday night.

KP’s Pick: Indianapolis Colts

 

THE WIFE

She HATES sports, but will pick teams in hopes of leading to your embarrassment (and there was plenty of that last year).  No blurb, just her selection, and we’re lucky to get that much!

Denver Broncos at Kansas City Chiefs (-3.5) – Broncos

Tennessee Titans at Cleveland Browns (-1.5) – Browns

Tampa Bay Buccaneers at New Orleans Saints (-10.5) – Saints

New England Patriots at Buffalo Bills (+0.5) – Patriots

Arizona Cardinals at Chicago Bears (+2.5) – Bears

San Francisco 49ers at Pittsburgh Steelers (-6.5) – Steelers

St. Louis Rams at Washington Redskins (+3.5) – Rams

San Diego Chargers at Cincinnati Bengals (-3.5) – Bengals

Houston Texans at Carolina Panthers (-3.5)Texans

Atlanta Falcons at New York Giants (-2.5) – Giants

Detroit Lions at Minnesota Vikings (-3.5) – Lions

Baltimore Ravens at Oakland Raiders (+7.5) – Ravens

Miami Dolphins at Jacksonville Jaguars (+6.5) – Jaguars

Dallas Cowboys at Philadelphia Eagles (-5.5) – Eagles

Seattle Seahawks at Green Bay Packers (-3.5) – Packers

New York Jets at Indianapolis (-7.5) – Jets

 

COIN FLIP

This quarter refuses to be referred to as “Chump change”… see what I did there?  Oh, and by the way, HEADS equals the HOME team, and TAILS is a vote for the AWAY team.

Denver Broncos at Kansas City Chiefs (-3.5) – Chiefs

Tennessee Titans at Cleveland Browns (-1.5) – Titans

Tampa Bay Buccaneers at New Orleans Saints (-10.5) – Buccaneers

New England Patriots at Buffalo Bills (+0.5) – Bills

Arizona Cardinals at Chicago Bears (+2.5) – Cardinals

San Francisco 49ers at Pittsburgh Steelers (-6.5) – Steelers

St. Louis Rams at Washington Redskins (+3.5) – Redskins

San Diego Chargers at Cincinnati Bengals (-3.5) – Bengals

Houston Texans at Carolina Panthers (-3.5) – Panthers

Atlanta Falcons at New York Giants (-2.5) – Falcons

Detroit Lions at Minnesota Vikings (-3.5) – Lions

Baltimore Ravens at Oakland Raiders (+7.5) – Raiders

Miami Dolphins at Jacksonville Jaguars (+6.5) – Dolphins

Dallas Cowboys at Philadelphia Eagles (-5.5) – Cowboys

Seattle Seahawks at Green Bay Packers (-3.5) – Packers

New York Jets at Indianapolis (-7.5) – Jets

 

SPORTSCHUMPS Picks

My long-time friend is back and seeking revenge.  Here are a few of the Chump’s Week 2 selections, and you best go see the rest at his site.

Tampa Bay at New Orleans (-9.5)

Earlier this week, still bitter about my team’s defeat, I Tweeted “Fortunately Buccaneers fans can’t be fined a million bucks for hoping the New Orleans Saints “kill the *&#$)* head” of Jameis Winston.”  I don’t care if nobody got it – #BountyGate – I thought it was pretty funny.  This one could get ugly.  This isn’t the same old New Orleans team that ran through the league a couple of years ago but they’re good enough to beat a Buccaneers team that looked pitiful.  Give me the Saints to cover because I’m still pissed.

San Francisco at Pittsburgh (-6)

On the underestimation kick, I think it might be time we stop counting out San Francisco.  Any team that gives the ball to Carlos Hyde 26 times a night should fare pretty well, at least it looked that way in Week One.  I’d look for a healthy dose of Hyde again against the Steelers.  And while the Steelers didn’t look entirely horrible offensively against the Patriots last week, they still lost the game.  While they should win this one, I’m going to take the six just because I liked what I saw out of the Niners and I don’t think Pittsburgh has put it all together yet.

San Diego at Cincinnati (-3)

This will probably be the best game of the weekend that nobody has any interest in watching.  At Cincy minus three, it’s pretty much a wash, meaning the odds makers think these teams are equal.  Damn!  Why did I agree to do this?  I don’t like Cincy but since they’re the home team and won by a larger margin last week than did Cincinnati albeit against a crappier opponent, I’ll take the Bengals.  I might as well have flipped a coin.

 

Special Guest: J-Dub

Meet J-Dub of Dubsism, a multi-talented writer with a pantload of opinions.  But will he have a pantload of wins?  His full list of selections are over at Sports Chump…but here are a few:

Atlanta at NY Giants (-1) (51) DOG OF THE WEEK: There’s just no reason to bet this game, and Vegas isn’t giving me a reason to lay down my hard-earned Franklins. I wouldn’t bet this game with Donald Trump’s money.

Dallas at Philadelphia (-5.5) (55) TRAP GAME OF THE WEEK, PART II: There’s way too much temptation to make the over-reaction bet on either team here. $50 over.

Tampa Bay at New Orleans (-11.5) (47) TRAP GAME OF THE WEEK, PART I:  To bet this game, I have to believe that Jamies Winston can lead the Bucs to three scores of any sort, and that the Saints can score more than 30 points.  I wouldn’t bet this with your money.