The world of football has one off week between early Fall and the first week of February, and quite frequently, it can be a somewhat quiet window when it comes to headlines. It’s not typically a good timeline for Throwing Tomatoes.
But this recent stretch was an absolute gold mine, starting with Kellen Winslow Jr., progressing with Justin Bieber and likely to continue as the Richard Sherman headlines continue to pour in.
Thankfully, produce sections throughout the country are stocked with plenty of tomatoes.
So, as the sports world turns, the stories pile up and more fan frustration emerges. But don’t sweat it, The Wife Hates Sports has them all covered – in lycopene, that is.
Throwing Tomatoes: January 27, 2014
Headliner: The Never-Ending Story of Richard Sherman
Die-hard followers of the NFL knew about Richard Sherman and his boisterous ways, but this year’s NFC Championship was his true coming out party – and in annoying fashion, as the talented Seattle cornerback is in the news like Chris Christie is in on an all you can eat buffet.
But the most fascinating headline may be from the New York Daily News, hinting that Sherman’s post-game rant was previously practiced and somewhat pre-meditated – that is, if the situation were to present itself, which in this case, it did.
The sports world is divided on Sherman, with words like “thug” or “misunderstood” being tossed around as frequently as a Peyton Manning touchdown pass. But if you read Sherman’s posts over at “The MMQB with Peter King”, you know he’s a smart and well-spoken individual.
It almost leaves a person to believe that Sherman borderline has multiple personalities, one on and one off the field – and with this theory in mind, we should pose the question:
Who will we get, Richard Sherman or Dick Sherman?
Perhaps, in the end, Sherman did plan the entire event, because not only does he relish being in the spotlight, but he also could be attempting to shelter first timers like Russell Wilson, leaving a lot less pressure on Seattle’s second-year quarterback.
Your guess is as good as mine.
Target: Justin Bieber
The under-aged, drag racin’, “sizzurp”-drinkin’, pill-poppin’ mess of an entertainer is caked in the headlines, especially since his arrest in Miami.
The best storyline of them all was the Dallas Stars jamming him during a home game versus the Maple Leafs.
A friend of TWHS put it pretty well, simply stating that if you look at Bieber’s mugshot (see above), this is clearly not a kid that understands the severity of the situation, and isn’t someone that thinks he will suffer any consequences from his actions – and I agree 100% with that thought process.
Some say Bieber should be deported, but c’mon, the “Great White North” wouldn’t even take him back. Heck, they have enough to deal with, what with Rob Ford still roaming the streets in Toronto.
The real WIN-WIN situation for all of us is this: Justin Bieber goes to rehab, which – two birds, with one stone – we wouldn’t have to suffer through any girlfriend rumors or albums dropping in the near future.
Innocent Bystander: Rob Ford
Rob Ford = Endless Comedy
Target (Literally): Kellen Winslow Jr.
By now, you know the embarrassing story where Jets tight end Kellen Winslow Jr. was reportedly not only caught on drug possession, but also according to a report, well…to quote Seinfeld, he was “treating his body like it was an amusement park”. This is all while being parked in a Target store parking lot.
Yes, Target, of all places.
What a jerk.
Hey, tip your waiters, “sinner”…
Innocent Bystanders: Kate Upton and Justin Verlander
Under the department listing of “Why does the world care so much?”…we present you with the topic of Kate Upton and her life in dating, where rumors are swirling more than the winter winds at MetLife Stadium. The latest rumor: Kate’s once again back with Detroit Tigers starting pitcher Justin Verlander.
Here’s a tomato-worthy joke for ya: What do Kate Upton and Justin Verlander’s fastball have in common? They both can bring the heat.
Again, tip your waiters – and keep ‘em comin’.
As for the real reason most of you are here, the obligatory Kate Upton “hot shot”:
Just don’t pull a Winslow, OK?
Target: Sochi Olympics
The Winter Olympics in Sochi are days away from its opening ceremony, and recently, two lycopene-covered stories hit the headlines:
1) The toilets – did you SEE them? Here’s what I first thought of:
2) The USA’s new duds – did you see THEM? Here was my first reaction:
— Kevin Paul (@kevinspaul) January 23, 2014
Los Angeles Kings – Five straight losses and losing ground to the Sharks and Ducks
Washington Capitals – Seven game losing streak finally snapped over the weekend
Los Angeles Lakers – Four straight losses and owners of the 2nd worst record in the West
Milwaukee Bucks – Just eight team wins and averaging an NBA-worst 91.3 ppg
This has been Throwing Tomatoes, where the red fruit prefers Alfalfa over Spanky.