Week 6 in the NFL was headlined by Tony Romo, DeMarco Murray and the Dallas Cowboys, traveling to Seattle and taking down the Seahawks in impressive fashion. Now it’s time for our NFL Week 7 Picks.
But something more impressive happened here, in this year-long, NFL pick ‘em pool against the spread. THE WIFE – yes, that Grey’s Anatomy watchin’, People readin’, Instagram postin’, SPORTS HATIN’ WIFE – posted an 11-4 record against the spread last week.
She doesn’t follow sports. She still barely even gets the spread and how it works, even though I’ve attempted to explain it to her about eight hundred times.
Putting us all to shame.
Oh, and by the way, the WIFE is now second place in this pick ‘em.
Perhaps this is a family calling.
That was Week 6, and here is last week’s quick recap:
Week 6 Recap:
KP (The Wife Hates Sports) – 9-6
Coin Flip – 6-9
Special Guest (Big Papa) – 8-7
Sports Chump – 6-8-1
The WIFE (that HATES sports) – 11-4
On to Week 7, featuring a hefty slate of interesting games, including 49ers-Broncos, Bengals-Colts and Giants Cowboys. Also, joining us this week is Special Guest Ed Hardiman (also referred to as “The Duck”). He’s a brilliant writer and personality, and we are lucky to have him.
Over in the “Pick Your Knows” department, KP now owns a six-game lead:
2014 NFL Season Standings (Against the Spread)
- A push is counted as a tie in the standings
- Slight variation in spreads due to time and site used for picks
It’s once again time to “Pick Your Knows” – the only time it’s not a disgusting habit – and here are our NFL Week 7 Picks (with spreads as they appeared through CBS Sports on 10/15/14).
KP’s “Pick Your Knows”: 2014 NFL Week 7 Picks
KP’s Week 6 Recap (Season Total):
Against the Spread: 9-6 (50-41, 55%)
Straight Up: 9-6 (56-35, 62%)
New York Jets at New England Patriots (-9.5)
The Patriots have been red hot, posting big wins over the Bengals and Bills in consecutive weeks. However, season-ending injuries to Stevan Ridley and Jerod Mayo put a hit on the team’s depth. Meanwhile, the Jets continue to be a mess, with Rex Ryan’s coaching seat getting hotter by the day. Ryan loves this rivalry and frequently finds a way to get his team up to playing the Pats. New York has managed 19 sacks on the year, tied for second in the NFL. But the Jets have also allowed big numbers through the air, and Tom Brady has New England’s offense clicking. But more importantly, the weather is looking to be a rainy mess and New England is likely to be without two starting offensive linemen. If the Jets can pressure Brady in sloppy conditions, while running well against a Mayo-less ‘D’, this could be a close game. Mother Nature is likely to take the Jets and the points, and you should, too.
Against the Spread: New York Jets
Straight Up: New England Patriots
NFL Picks Week 7 Update: Patriots 27, Jets 25 – Pick posted to SportsChump prior to game
Minnesota Vikings at Buffalo Bills (-3.5)
One of my key mistakes from last week was overhyping rookie quarterback Teddy Bridgewater, specifically when facing off against Detroit’s defense, which is ranked first in total yards allowed. Bridgewater’s big game was against a struggling Atlanta defense, and I should have taken note of that. This week, the Vikings will face Buffalo’s defense which is ranked number one against the run, allowing 67.5 yards per game. That unit could limit the Bridgewater/McKinnon/Asiata combo on the ground, putting all pressure on Bridgewater in the passing game. Buffalo’s pass rush (19 sacks, tied for 2nd in the NFL) could also wreak havoc, much like Detroit’s did last week. For these reasons and more, I’m taking the Bills to cover at home. Maybe next time, Teddy…
Against the Spread: Buffalo Bills
Straight Up: Buffalo Bills
Atlanta Falcons at Baltimore Ravens (-6.5)
I feel like I misfire on the Falcons every week… might have to go back and tally that up to see if it’s true. Atlanta is always tricky for me, because I have great respect for its strong passing game, while also recognizing the team’s struggles on defense. Atlanta’s third ranked passing offense should be able to move the ball on Baltimore’s 27th ranked pass defense. But of the teams in the bottom ten in passing yards allowed, the Ravens have allowed the fewest TD’s through the air, with six. Atlanta, meanwhile, has allowed the most rushing TD’s in the league, with twelve. The Ravens have allowed just seven sacks on the season, while Atlanta’s ‘D’ has only managed six as a team. That likely means plenty of time for Joe Flacco to throw. Playing at home, I like the Ravens to cover and win by a touchdown.
Against the Spread: Baltimore Ravens
Straight Up: Baltimore Ravens
Miami Dolphins at Chicago Bears (-3.5)
Knowhon Moreno is out for the year, leaving Lamar Miller to take over the role as primary back in Miami. Miller has played well in recent weeks, and faces Chicago’s run defense that is ranked 10th in yards allowed per game. No lopsided stats jump out in this game, but I do expect Miami’s sixth-ranked rushing offense to control the clock and keep the game close. The Dolphins have also played well against better teams, topping the Patriots and nearly upending the Packers. A field goal game seems like a good bet, so I’m taking Miami and the points.
Against the Spread: Miami Dolphins
Straight Up: Chicago Bears
Carolina Panthers at Green Bay Packers (-7.5)
Cam Newton is getting healthier and becoming more of the multi-dimensional threat that he’s been in previous seasons. That was clearly visible in last week’s tie against the Bengals. Carolina has scored 68 points over the last two weeks, showing it can survive a shootout with the Packers. Green Bay’s passing defense has nine INT’s, more than any other team in the NFL. Newton has just 2 INT’s this season. I like Aaron Rodgers and the Pack to win at home, but a healthier Cam Newton can push the Panthers to keep this a one score game. Take Carolina and the points.
Against the Spread: Carolina Panthers
Straight Up: Green Bay Packers
Cleveland Browns at Jacksonville Jaguars (+5.5)
Guys, maybe you’ve heard this from me before… the Jags give up a lot of sacks. Twenty-seven in six games, to be exact! Still, Jacksonville has held its own in recent games, losing tight games to both Pittsburgh and Tennessee. How is Cleveland’s pass rush? It is ranked 19th in the NFL, with ten sacks, so… nothing special. But the Browns’ offense has been explosive as of late. The Jags are a -8 in turnover differential (only Washington is worse), and when you add that with Cleveland’s balanced offense and third-ranked rushing attack, I like the Browns to cover on the road.
Against the Spread: Cleveland Browns
Straight Up: Cleveland Browns
Seattle Seahawks at St. Louis Rams (+6.5)
It’s been an interesting week for the Super Bowl champs, starting with the home loss to Dallas and finishing with the surprising Percy Harvin trade. But let’s be honest, this team is going to be fine, with tons of talent on both its offense and defense. The Rams have found a nice surprise in QB Austin Davis, but let’s face it, he can’t do everything by himself. As I say week after week with the Jags, I do the same with the Rams: St. Louis still has one sack on the season. What happens when you can’t put any pressure on Russell Wilson and the Seattle offense? You get torched. Seahawks cover.
Against the Spread: Seattle Seahawks
Straight Up: Seattle Seahawks
Cincinnati Bengals at Indianapolis Colts (-3.5)
There are two keys to this game for me: 1) A.J. Green is doubtful, taking away Cincinnati’s best offensive weapon and 2) The Bengals’ defense has really faltered over the last two weeks, allowing 80 total points over the last two games. Combine that with a Colts team that is dangerous on its home turf and is both number one in passing offense (328.7 ypg) and TD’s through the air, with 17. Andrew Luck is putting up MVP-like numbers, and expect more of that from Indy on Sunday. Colts cover.
Against the Spread: Indianapolis Colts
Straight Up: Indianapolis Colts
New Orleans Saints at Detroit Lions (-3.5)
I hate this line…hate it like the SportsChump hates that he agreed to do this contest. There are numerous reasons for that. First, it’s the uncertainty of stars playing. Calvin Johnson and Jimmy Graham are both questionable, with Johnson being the more likely player to be out. Next, what is going on with the Saints? New Orleans is the biggest disappointment in the NFLl this season. Now, the Saints travel to Detroit to take on the NFL’s top overall defense, allowing less than 200 yards per game through the air and only five TD’s. Detroit is also second versus the run and first in sacks, with 20. Then, we have Drew Brees and the New Orleans pass offense, which is second in yards per game. Despite the struggles, New Orleans converts 54.8% of its third downs (2nd in NFL). Rob Ryan and the Saints’ defense has been terrible, but again, Detroit may be without both Calvin Johnson and Eric Ebron. I underestimated Detroit’s ‘D’ last week, but that was against Teddy Bridgewater. This time, it’s Drew Brees, with a bye week to prepare. For these reasons, I’m taking the Saints to win outright.
Against the Spread: New Orleans Saints
Straight Up: New Orleans Saints
Tennessee Titans at Washington Redskins (-4.5)
Here’s a stat for ya: This game features the two teams with the worst third-down conversion percentage in the NFL. The Redskins are 31st (23 for 71, 32.4%) and the Titans are dead last (23 for 72, 31.9%). Translation: This should be a fun game to watch if neither team reaches third down. Getting past these ugly stat lines, let’s switch over to turnover differential, where the Titans are a +2 (tie – 14th in NFL), while the Redskins are dead last, posting a -9, with 13 giveaways and just four takeaways. Still, Washington has the home field advantage, and plenty of weapons to throw at a younger Tennessee roster. The Redskins’ stats also may be a tad skewed, after having to face the likes of the Cardinals, Seahawks, Giants and Eagles. Washington gets a late field goal and wins by 3. Take the Titans and the points.
Against the Spread: Tennessee Titans
Straight Up: Washington Redskins
Kansas City Chiefs at San Diego Chargers (-4.5)
Kansas City is coming off its bye week, and if you know Andy Reid’s history following bye weeks, then you like Kansas City to put up a good fight. Reid is 13-2 coming off a bye, although the two losses have come over the last two years. The Chargers have played great at home this season, defeating the Seahawks in Week 2, and blowing out both the Jets and Jags in recent weeks. San Diego has scored 30 or more points in four of its last five games. But the Chiefs will likely use its fourth-ranked rushing offense to try and keep San Diego’s offense off the field. I refuse to pick against the Chargers at home, but with K.C.’s run game and Andy Reid’s bye week record, I like Kansas City to keep this game close. Take the Chiefs and the points.
Against the Spread: Kansas City Chiefs
Straight Up: San Diego Chargers
Arizona Cardinals at Oakland Raiders (+3.5)
Remember what I said about the Raiders playing teams tough at home? Last week was one example of that, where Oakland lost by three points to the Chargers. The Raiders will likely focus on the passing game, considering it can’t move the ball on the ground and Arizona is last in the NFL in yards allowed through the air (309 ypg). Arizona is also third against the run, which is another sign that Oakland will likely be one-dimensional on Sunday. When a team is this one-dimensional offensively, and facing off against a solid playoff contender, the game is likely to get out of hand. Cardinals cover on the road.
Against the Spread: Arizona Cardinals
Straight Up: Arizona Cardinals
New York Giants at Dallas Cowboys (-5.5)
Here’s an interesting game, especially after last week, when Dallas took a major step forward after beating the Seahawks in Seattle. On the other side, New York was shutout by the Eagles. Look at the running games first: Dallas has the top rushing offense, averaging 160.3 yards per game, while the Giants are ranked 18th against the run. New York will again be without Rashad Jennings and also lost Victor Cruz for the season last week. Those are two major losses on offense, and to this point, we don’t know if players like Odell Beckham Jr. can pick up the slack in the passing game. With that in mind, and Dallas playing at home, I like Romo and the ‘Boys to keep on rolling. Dallas covers.
Against the Spread: Dallas Cowboys
Straight Up: Dallas Cowboys
San Francisco 49ers at Denver Broncos (-6.5)
The 49ers are playing on short rest, after dismantling the Rams on the road last week. As I’ve mentioned before, I like San Francisco’s balanced attack, but this will be a tough test against Peyton Manning on the road. Patrick Willis and Mike Iupati are both out this week, and will be tough losses for San Francisco. The Niners are 24th in the NFL in opponent third downs converted (46.4%). Picture Peyton taking advantage of that stat, while facing a team that played Monday night and is missing a few key pieces. Manning and the Broncos cover at home.
Against the Spread: Denver Broncos
Straight Up: Denver Broncos
Houston Texans at Pittsburgh Steelers (-3.5)
If not for the Saints, the Steelers might be my most disappointing team of the season. A blowout at the hands of the Browns last week, a struggle against the Jags the week prior and a loss at home to the Bucs the week before that? It’s getting ugly in the Steel City. Next up is Bill O’Brien and the Texans on Monday Night Football. Over the last few weeks, the Texans put up a good fight against two great teams, losing to Dallas in OT and by five to the Colts on Thursday, the 9th. Which, oh by the way, means that Houston has had a few extra days to rest and prepare for this game. On top of this, Pittsburgh has allowed 17 sacks on the season, the fourth most in the NFL. Hello, Pittsburgh? I’d like you to meet J.J. Watt. Texans win this one outright.
Against the Spread: Houston Texans
Straight Up: Houston Texans
Bye Week: Philadelphia Eagles and Tampa Bay Buccaneers
She HATES sports, but will pick teams in hopes of leading to your embarrassment. No blurb, just her NFL Week 7 Picks. Heck, we’re lucky to get that much.
New York Jets at New England Patriots (-9.5) – Jets
Minnesota Vikings at Buffalo Bills (-3.5) – Bills
Atlanta Falcons at Baltimore Ravens (-6.5) – Ravens
Miami Dolphins at Chicago Bears (-3.5) – Dolphins
Carolina Panthers at Green Bay Packers (-7.5) – Packers
Cleveland Browns at Jacksonville Jaguars (+5.5) – Browns
Seattle Seahawks at St. Louis Rams (+6.5) – Rams
Cincinnati Bengals at Indianapolis Colts (-3.5) – Bengals
New Orleans Saints at Detroit Lions (-3.5) – Saints
Tennessee Titans at Washington Redskins (-4.5) – Titans
Kansas City Chiefs at San Diego Chargers (-4.5) – Chiefs
Arizona Cardinals at Oakland Raiders (+3.5) – Cardinals
New York Giants at Dallas Cowboys (-5.5) – Cowboys
San Francisco 49ers at Denver Broncos (-6.5) – Broncos
Houston Texans at Pittsburgh Steelers (-3.5) – Steelers
This quarter refuses to be referred to as “Chump change”… see what I did there? Oh, and by the way, HEADS equals the HOME team, and TAILS is a vote for the AWAY team. Here are the NFL Week 7 Picks for that pesky coin.
New York Jets at New England Patriots (-9.5) – Patriots
Minnesota Vikings at Buffalo Bills (-3.5) – Vikings
Atlanta Falcons at Baltimore Ravens (-6.5) – Ravens
Miami Dolphins at Chicago Bears (-3.5) – Bears
Carolina Panthers at Green Bay Packers (-7.5) – Panthers
Cleveland Browns at Jacksonville Jaguars (+5.5) – Browns
Seattle Seahawks at St. Louis Rams (+6.5) – Seahawks
Cincinnati Bengals at Indianapolis Colts (-3.5) – Colts
New Orleans Saints at Detroit Lions (-3.5) – Saints
Tennessee Titans at Washington Redskins (-4.5) – Redskins
Kansas City Chiefs at San Diego Chargers (-4.5) – Chargers
Arizona Cardinals at Oakland Raiders (+3.5) – Cardinals
New York Giants at Dallas Cowboys (-5.5) – Giants
San Francisco 49ers at Denver Broncos (-6.5) – 49ers
Houston Texans at Pittsburgh Steelers (-3.5) – Steelers
SPORTSCHUMP’S “He’s still in last, but continues to pick” NFL Week 7 Picks
NY JETS +9.5 at NEW ENGLAND
The Jets are out of control. While I thought last week this team might show up to play for Rex Ryan, who has one foot off the plank and the other not so firmly planted on it, they did no such thing. Denver won and covered. The Jets remain one of the worst teams in the league with no signs of getting better. In fact, the New York media is so far up Geno Smith’s ass, he’s colonoscopy-free ‘til his late 60s.
On the other hand, the Patriots, are well, the Patriots. They’re banged up but are still managing to get things done. I have no doubts the Pats will win this game but can they cover the nine-and-a-half? Here’s the thing. As much as the Jets suck, the Patriots just lost Jerrod Mayo, their leading tackler, and Steven Ridley, their leading rusher. On a short week, that’s a lot to overcome. Chalk in the fact that three of the last four match-ups between these two teams have been decided by three points or less and I’m gonna take the Jets to cover the 9.5
CINCINNATI +3 at INDIANAPOLIS
Cincy’s good but I’ve been harping all year about Indy’s toughness. After starting the season on a two-game skid, the Colts have rattled off four straight wins. Their last two were the most impressive: a home win to Baltimore and a Thursday night road win at Houston. The Colts are the best passing team in the league and solid on both sides of the ball. Cincinnati, despite their record, is not one of the better defensive teams in the league. That might come back to bite them against Andrew Luck and his two-back set of Trent Richardson and Ahmad Bradshaw. I like the Colts here minus the three as their toughness train continues.
TENNESSEE +5.5 at (THAT TEAM FROM) WASHINGTON
It was nice of the NFL to schedule these two teams to play against one another at this point in the season figuring both use a victory. The Titans are 2-4 and the Redskins are 1-5. I’m gonna go ahead and guess this won’t be the game featured on the big screen on your local pub on Sunday. That being said, Jake Locker is starting to piss me off. Every time I try to have my picks in by Thursday’s game, I look to the injury reports to see if Locker is going to play. He doesn’t decide until after I post my picks. How many times in one season can a guy be a game-time decision? It’s almost as if he’s reading the site just to throw me off. The heat is on him these days so, bum wrist or no bum wrist, I’m guessing he suits up. Even if he doesn’t, is (that team from) Washington good enough to beat ANYONE by five-and-a-half? I don’t think so. I’m taking the Titans and the points.
MIAMI +3 at CHICAGO
Miami lines baffle me. The Dolphins must have one of the largest wagering fan bases in the nation because in every game they play, I feel they’re getting (or giving) too many points. They did cover last week at home to Green Bay depending on how early you got in on that line meaning Aaron Rodger’s last second touchdown drove a stake through the hearts of some, not others. It’s not going to get much easier this week in Chicago. The Bears are coming off an impressive road win in Atlanta and should handle the Knowshon Moreno-less Fish pretty easily in the windy city. Ironically though, this line is moving in Miami’s direction, having opened at three-and-a-half. There’s no way I’m going with the betting public here. The Bears get their first home win of the season this weekend and cover the number.
CLEVELAND -5.5 at JACKSONVILLE
I’m 0-6 this year in picking Jacksonville games. I’ve been high on them to cover this season (or perhaps just plain high from the looks of my picks). I finally take them not to cover last week and what do they do? You guessed it. They covered. It’s okay. I’ve been underestimating the Cleveland Browns all season too so hopefully two wrongs will finally make a right. Cleveland is the hottest team nobody is talking about. They’re 3-2 in the toughest division in football.
Jacksonville is 0-6 and would suck in any division. Their opponents are outscoring them by more than a two-to-one margin and they’re only scoring about 13 points per game. By that logic, the Browns should only need to score 19 to cover this spread. I think they’re perfectly capable of doing that against a Jacksonville defense that’s more porous than the Buccaneers trying to cover Joe Flacco. Even though the Brownies just lost their starting center, I’ll still take the Brownies and lay.
SEATTLE -6.5 at ST. LOUIS
Revenge is a dish best served cold. Seattle is coming off an embarrassing home defeat to the hands of the Dallas Cowboys. St. Louis is coming off a short week… and an embarrassing come-from-behind loss to the San Francisco 49ers. If you watch him carefully, Jeff Fisher has that deer in the headlights look on his face when he’s patrolling the sidelines. Seriously, watch the next time the cameras pan on him. He’s not even facing the field. Maybe he can’t bear to watch his team play. The Seahawks aren’t as bad as they looked against Dallas and the Rams aren’t as good as they looked against San Francisco. I’m taking last year’s Super Bowl champs to cover on the road.
CAROLINA +7 at GREEN BAY
Tough game to pick here. Next year, when we host this contest, remind me to implement a “One Game A Week We Can Opt Out Of” clause. The Packers are hot but as Cam Newton showed us last week the Panthers can play on the road with the best of ‘em. The Panthers kissed their sister (which I believe is legal in North Carolina) with a tie at Cincinnati. This is one game Carolina can ill afford to drop as their next three are against Seattle, New Orleans and Philadelphia. This will be a four-game stretch that could determine whether the Panthers make the post-season. I know Green Bay is hot but I like Carolina to keep this one close considering what they have ahead of them.
ATLANTA +7 at BALTIMORE
Let’s look closely at this line, shall we? Atlanta is not as bad as they’ve shown so far this season. The optimistic Falcons fan might refer to their team as ‘inconsistently good.’ Baltimore is not nearly as good as they showed us last week. A trip to Tampa Bay is always useful when it comes to padding one’s offensive stats. You’re welcome, Joe Flacco. Do you know how when you haven’t been challenged at work lately and your performance begins to suffer?
I’m thinking that last week’s scrimmage against the Buccaneers got the Ravens a little too fat, dumb and happy. They won’t do that against Atlanta, who also mauled Tampa Bay. (It’s bad when Tampa Bay’s futility against the rest of the league becomes a barometer for measuring other team’s success). The Falcons desperately need a solid effort on the road. They’re 2-4 and another loss would put them too far behind in the NFC South. I think the Falcons give it their all here, which should be at least enough to cover the touchdown.
MINNESOTA+3.5 at BUFFALO
Has Minnesota figured out their quarterback situation yet? Has anyone in Minnesota figured out why people in Minnesota still live in Minnesota? Are we celebrating the fact Adrian Peterson hasn’t done anything stupid (as far as we know) in the last 48 hours? If there was one game you would vote off the island this week, it’d be this one and not only because Kyle Orton refuses to shave the power ‘stache. As unconfident as I am in the Buffalo Bills, I’m even less confident in the Vikings. I have to take the Bills here to cover.
NEW ORLEANS + 3 at DETROIT
I saw some talking head on ESPN report that the Detroit Lions have the best defense in the league. I was actually quite surprised to hear that. After doing a little research, that guy knew what he was talking about. Detroit gives up the fewest yards and the fewest points per game in the NFL. That being said, four of their six games have come against the Jets, Giants, Bills and Vikings. The Saints haven’t been clicking on all offensive cylinders but they are a far cry from the four teams I just mentioned. I’m guessing the Lions are going to allow more than two touchdowns this game as reality sets in on Detroit. I’m taking the Saints in my upset special of the week.
KANSAS CITY +4 at SAN DIEGO
I’m high on San Diego, guys. It’s hard not to be. They’ve scored thirty points or more in three of their last four games. They’re not rushing the ball very well but Philip Rivers has been lights out #MVPCandidate. KC on the other hand is one of the best rushing teams in the league and is also solid against the pass. They should be able to control enough clock to keep Rivers off the field. If KC loses this one, they’ll really be in a tough spot in that division. That being said, I think the Chargers are just too hot. Four isn’t all that much to lay here which is why I’m doing just that.
NY GIANTS + 6 at DALLAS
After last week’s games involving these two teams, it’s surprising this line is only six. Sunday night against the Eagles, Eli Manning and company could barely move the ball, forward at least. It was going backwards just fine. At one point in the game, they had 87 yards in total offense and 55 yards in total penalties. Plus they lost Victor Cruz for the season. On the other hand, Dallas convinced everyone they are legit Super Bowl contenders with an impressive victory in Seattle. New York’s post-season chances are all but done as these two teams are going in opposite directions. I don’t see how anybody in their right mind could take the G-Men and the six in this game.
ARIZONA -3 at OAKLAND
Carson Palmer returned to action last week and led his team to victory in a scrimmage against (that team from) Washington. This Sunday he’ll have yet another warm-up before having to play a real NFL team. The Raiders have yet to win a game this season and correct me if I’m wrong but Palmer played an abysmal two years in Oakland. He had to secretly be happy about leaving that godforsaken franchise. I mean, who wouldn’t be? This weekend, he reminds the Raiders that he can still play and that they cannot. I look for the Cards to cover.
SAN FRANCISCO + 6.5 at DENVER
This one’s a toss-up but a great Sunday night game for sure. Brothers and sisters, get your tape decks ready. I know Denver can score with the best of them but doesn’t a touchdown seem like a lot to lay against one of the better teams in the league? (Hold on, I’m talking myself through this). Ya’ know what? It’s early enough in the season that this game doesn’t matter all that much. Both these teams will make the playoffs and this is probably more of a statement game to Denver than it is to San Francisco. Denver’s also been a little more consistent this year than San Fran. I’m going out on a limb here and saying Denver covers the touch. Just call it a hunch.
HOUSTON + 3 at PITTSBURGH
Why are the Steelers favored here? They lost to the Buccaneers at home and just got waxed by the Cleveland Browns. Oh wait, it’s because the Texans suck too. Great Monday night game, fellas. I might just have to pick up a book instead. In a battle of two sucky teams that have no business playing a prime time game, calling these two mediocre would be a compliment. As bad as the Steelers are, the Texans are an absolute train wreck. I’m going with the Steelers here just because I have to pick one of these teams to win.
Special Guest: Ed “The Duck” Hardiman
I’m a longtime friend and fan of Mr. Hardiman (from back in the good ol’ days of the FOX Sports community). Both he and I also had contracts with FOX Sports, as well. He’s jam-packed with genius and humor, so sit back and take in “The Duck’s” magic, with his NFL Week 7 Picks.
I would remind everybody that on any given Sunday you can go broke taking my NFL gambling advice…
New York Jets (+9.5) at New England Patriots
Take New England giving the points…
I don’t see the NY Jets covering since the Pats have clocked their last two opponents and Ryan is on his last legs, wait isn’t he into feet, even though last year the Jets covered in NE.
Cincinnati Bengals (+3) at Indianapolis Colts
I’m going with the Horseshoes on this one but it is a coin toss as two Div leaders butt heads. I just can’t bet on the Bengals since Icky left…
Tennessee Titans (+4.5) at Washington Redskins
I don’t see the Fredskins doing much of anything this season let alone covering. They meet the hapless fellow one-winner Titans in the Super Bowl of Tricky Point Spreads, GO TITANS!!!
Miami Dolphins (+3.5) at Chicago Bears
Da Bears cover at home cause the Fins stink like tuna in a dumpster this year…
Cleveland Browns (-4.5) at Jacksonville Jaguars
Brownies look to cover as the Jags are a pile of smoking rubble, hey maybe they’ll have a new uniform next season, in their hot new Jag color, burnt toast…
Seattle Seahawks (-6.5) at St. Louis Rams
The Seahawks cover easy on the road, as the Rams fold like a cheap card table to the angry Sea Chickens looking to wipe last week off their chin…
Carolina Panthers (+7) at Green Bay Packers
Panthers haven’t given up lots of points, I like GB to win, but I don’t see them covering the spread, got to go Carolina…
Atlanta Falcons (+7) at Baltimore Ravens
Ravens cover easy. Falcons are the gift that keeps giving all season long…
Minnesota Vikings (+4) at Buffalo Bills
Geebus this is like a homework assignment, how many freaking games are there??? That extry point past a field goal is the heartbreaker, even though this is a mutt of a game, take the Vikings cause that lil dab’ll do you…
New Orleans Saints (+3) at Detroit Lions
Aints ain’t getting it done, Lions cover easy at home…
Kansas City Chiefs (+4) at San Diego Chargers
Post Bye Andy Reid getting 4, I’ll go with Andy and the Chiefs, he was 13-1 after the bye in Philly so 4 points should bring home the ranch and the dog…KC baby!
New York Giants (+5.5) at Dallas Cowboys
The Giants stand no chance in Dallas with Cruz gone. Eli better stock up on Ben Gay, he’s getting tub-thumped for the 2nd week in a row, and Dallas covers easy-peasy-lemon-squeezy…
Arizona Cardinals (-3.5) at Oakland Raiders
Cards ain’t a juggernaut but they aren’t the Oakland Doormats either, if I wasn’t certain Frodo cast Al Davis into the lava in Mount Doom, I’d say he was spinning in his grave. Take the Cards leave the cannoli…
San Francisco 49ers (+6.5) at Denver Broncos
I don’t get this point spread at all, it disrespects a 4-win 49ers team that looks better every week, take the Niners, even though the Broncos should win.
Houston Texans (+3.5) at Pittsburgh Steelers
Ugh, two mediocre teams in a snoozefest kinda game, might actually get beaten in the ratings by sewing Chat with Connie on community access cable …OK but only cause I have to let me shake the Magic Eight-Ball, it says, “…Outlook not so good…” Texans by half a point…
Yes, it has… and you’re here just in time. Someone has been taking your avatar and your name and making really bad football picks for seven weeks. You still have time to save face and save the legacy of the Chump.
It should probably have happened two years ago, TOP… but I think it’s safe to say that this is the year that Rex finally gets removed from the head coaching gig in NY. He’ll probably land a DC job somewhere and get back to having some success.
I just woke up.
Has the season started yet?