The sports world may be without hockey, but it’s beyond buzzing as of late, what with the baseball offseason rumors, College Football nearing its postseason, the NFL still cooking along and the NBA a few weeks into its regular season.

As the sports world turns, the stories pile up and more sports frustration emerges.  But don’t sweat it, The Wife Hates Sports has them all covered – in lycopene, that is.

brandon marshall viagra nfl Throwing Tomatoes: Brandon Marshall, Viagra, Rajon Rondo, Drew Brees, Charles Barkley, Cowboys Fans and Other Underachievements

Brandon Marshall says NFL players are Viagra for a competitive edge. What do you think?

Throwing Tomatoes: December 1, 2012

Target: Brandon Marshall’s Viagra

For those that missed the headline, Chicago WR Brandon Marshall was quoted as saying that some NFL players use Viagra for a competitive edge on the field.

Upon first hearing this tidbit of news, I sent the following tweet:

[blackbirdpie url=”https://twitter.com/kevinspaul/status/273883653451440128″]

Seriously, players know that it’s the ball that still has to cross the plane, right?

The next time you see an NFL player, try not to say, “Is that a pylon in your pants, or are you just happy to see me?”

Anyone else think the NFL cheerleaders may be offended that the players need this stuff?

hot nfl cheerleaders dancing Throwing Tomatoes: Brandon Marshall, Viagra, Rajon Rondo, Drew Brees, Charles Barkley, Cowboys Fans and Other Underachievements

Should these ladies be offended that some NFL players might be using Viagra?

Target: Dallas Cowboys Fan Sends Petition to the White House

A Dallas Cowboys fan sent a petition to the White House asking for Jerry Jones to be removed as the owner and general manager of the franchise.

This is the most ridiculous story of the year – and clearly the winner of the largest tomato of the week.  Sure, President Obama isn’t shy about being a sports fan, but with all that’s going on in the world, plus the hardships that we’ve had with loss of jobs and a struggling economy, some guy actually thinks that the White House has time to address his underachieving football franchise?

C’mon pal, get off your couch and get a hobby.

Sub-Target: Other Cowboys Fans

Nearly one hundred Cowboys fans actually signed the petition, as reported by DallasNews.comsplatteredtomato Throwing Tomatoes: Brandon Marshall, Viagra, Rajon Rondo, Drew Brees, Charles Barkley, Cowboys Fans and Other Underachievements

Target: Drew Brees

Drew Brees’ incredible touchdown streak is over with.  In a 23-13 loss on Thursday night to the Falcons, the Saints QB also threw five picks for the first time in his career.  While the record itself was an incredible one, this was a horrid performance for one of the league’s elite quarterbacks, especially when his team was in a must-win situation.

Target: Cincinnati Reds’ Handling of Aroldis Chapman

The Cincinnati Reds have told Aroldis Chapman to begin preparing to be a starting pitcher.

Clearly, Chapman has a ton of talent and a ferocious fastball.  But he’s also a bit wild, and while the Reds invested millions in the pitcher, this entire situation just screams Josh Bard to me.

For those that need a memory refresher, Bard was a power pitcher with a wild side that Boston used in its starting rotation last season – and the experiment went horribly wrong.

charles barkley the woman weight watchers Throwing Tomatoes: Brandon Marshall, Viagra, Rajon Rondo, Drew Brees, Charles Barkley, Cowboys Fans and Other Underachievements

C’mon Chuck, Bobby Petrino…really?

This situation is eerily similar and I can’t help but see Chapman being a power arm with closer stuff.  Sure, he’ll have the occasional wild game or two, but put him at the back end of the bullpen where he belongs.  One could also make the argument that a guy with an arm like this is just asking for a significant arm injury when being extended to a starting role.

Target: Charles Barkley

The former NBA star and current TV analyst is looking for Bobby Petrino to be the next football coach at Auburn.  Man, c’mon Chuck, and I thought you had stooped really low when you dressed up like a woman in those Weight Watchers commercials.

Stick to your golf game, big guy.  Petrino is NOT the answer.

Innocent Bystander: Bobby Petrino

Perhaps I shouldn’t use the word innocent when referring to Petrino, eh?

Target: Rajon Rondo

Boston Celtics guard Rajon Rondo was recently suspended two games for his involvement in a brawl against the Brooklyn Nets.

I’m all for a player protecting his teammates, but this was a bit much, and with the way Boston has been playing, it’s worse for the Celtics to lose its key player and the current NBA league leader in assists.  Plain and simple, Rondo has to be smarter than that.

Sub-Target: Kris Humphries

lance rock yo gabba gabba Throwing Tomatoes: Brandon Marshall, Viagra, Rajon Rondo, Drew Brees, Charles Barkley, Cowboys Fans and Other Underachievements

C’mon Riley, the Teletubbies are soooooo yesterday…

Humphries committed the hard foul on Kevin Garnett during the game.  But in the end, we can’t come down too hard on him, because after all, what can we really expect from a guy that married a Kardashian?

Target: Riley Sheahan

If you don’t think that hockey needs to come back, then look at this headline:

“Arrest report: Red Wings prospect Riley Sheahan was ‘super drunk’ in Teletubby costume”

The NHL labor dispute stinks like this prospect’s booz breath.  Speaking of which, didn’t anyone tell this guy that it’s all about Yo Gabba Gabba! these days anyway?

Four Words = Four Tomatoes:

“Mark Sanchez Butt Fumble”

And finally, the current faces of team frustration in sports:

Washington WizardsThey finally won a game, but the Wizards are 1-13 on the season.

Los Angeles LakersDwight Howard whined and cried his way out of Orlando, but his new team of superstars was below the .500-mark after 15 games – and now sits at 8-8.

Philadelphia EaglesSeven straight losses; Hope Andy Reid has posted his resume

Arizona CardinalsSeven straight defeats after starting the year 4-0

This has been Throwing Tomatoes, where there’s no need for performance enhancement.

Special Shout-Out to Tom Lancaster, who I fully expect to show up and give me a very hard time about the Yo Gabba Gabba! reference.  Eight hours in the car on the way to Penn State and some of that stuff will stick with you.

Special Thanks go out to my pal ‘Rev’, the Sports Chump, who encouraged me to get Throwing Tomatoes back into the mix.  For those unaware, Rev and I met in the Fox Sports Community seven years ago, and TT was a regular post for me at that site.

 

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